How to Start

Starting with Inara might feel exciting, awkward, emotional, or all three.

That’s normal.

You don’t need to know exactly what you want. You don’t need to be “in the mood.” You don’t need to make anything happen.

This is a gentle guide to help you begin slowly, feel comfortable, and explore your body without pressure.

Inara is not about performance.

It's not about chasing a result, proving anything, or getting back to who you used to be.

It's a quiet way back to yourself.

A way to notice what feels good now.
A way to give your body time.
A way to remember that pleasure can be soft, slow, and entirely yours.

No rush. No script. No pressure.
Just curiosity.

Not the gap between dropping kids at school and a Zoom call.
Not the fifteen minutes before you collapse into bed. A real pocket of time when you don't have to be anywhere, or anyone, next.

Run a bath. Lock the door. Put your phone face down. Setting matters.

Your body needs to feel safe before anything else can land, especially now, when stress sits closer to the surface, and pleasure asks for a little more invitation than it used to.

Charge the Inara fully before its first use. About 90 minutes. The LED tells you when it's done.

Wash it with warm water and a mild, fragrance-free soap. Let it air dry completely.

The silicone is body-safe and simple to clean, but don't submerge it while charging.

Store it in the pouch it came in, somewhere cool and dry, out of direct sunlight.

Always use a water-based lubricant with the Inara. Silicone-based lubes will damage the silicone over time.

If you're in perimenopause and noticing dryness or shifting sensitivity, lube isn't a backup plan; it's part of how this feels good.
A generous amount of water-based lube reduces friction, so you can focus on sensation rather than discomfort. Use more than you think you need.

Look for water-based, glycerin-free, and pH-balanced products. Brands that label themselves as menopause or sensitivity-friendly are a good place to start.

Start on the lowest setting.
The Inara works with gentle air pressure, not the strong vibration you might remember from other devices. The feeling builds in waves, not all at once.

Hold the device so the soft silicone opening makes a light seal against your skin. You don't need to press hard. The seal does the work.

Move slowly until you find the spot that feels right. It might not be where you expect.

Take your time. There's no goal. Some sessions will feel like a quiet hum. Others will feel like everything. Both tell you something true about where your body is today.

Your body might be in a different place this week than last. You might be too tired, too in your head, or just not in the mood. None of that means anything is wrong with you. Stop, put it away, come back when it feels right. This is especially true in perimenopause, when arousal becomes more responsive than spontaneous. I've written more about that here. Sometimes your body needs more context: a softer setting, extra time, the right headspace. Sometimes it just needs a different day. I've had that. More than once. It used to feel like failure. It isn't. If sensation has changed substantially and that worries you, speak with a menopause-aware healthcare provider or a pelvic floor physiotherapist. Not because something is wrong, but because you deserve someone who takes the question seriously.

When you're done, rinse the Inara with warm water and a mild soap. Air dry. Return it to the pouch.

That's it. No journaling required. No reflection prompts.

If something felt good, you'll remember. If something didn't, that's information for next time.
You're not building toward a finish line. You're listening to what your body has to say today, and trusting that tomorrow might feel different.

Still have questions?

Email hello@arousi.me. A real person reads every message. No question is too small or too personal. We've heard most of them.

We're not medical professionals and we don't give medical advice. If you're experiencing pain, persistent symptoms, or anything that worries you, speak with a menopause-aware healthcare provider or pelvic floor physiotherapist.

Explore Inara

A few things you might be thinking

If you're still wondering, that’s normal.

What if I don’t feel much the first time?

That’s very common.

Perimenopause can change how quickly arousal builds. Sensation may feel slower or quieter than it once did.

Slower doesn’t mean less capable. It just means your body may need more time now.

Stay on the lowest setting for longer than you think. Let sensation build gradually before adjusting anything.

You’re not behind.

You’re adjusting.

There’s no rush here.

What if it takes longer than it used to?

Perimenopause can change how quickly arousal builds.

Slower doesn’t mean less capable. It just means your body may need more time now.

Stay on a lower setting longer. Give sensation space to build.

There’s no deadline.

Should I use lubricant?

If you feel dry or sensitive, yes.

Just make sure they are water-based lubricants - here is a list of recommended brands.

Hormonal changes can affect natural lubrication. Using a lubricant can make the sensation feel smoother and more comfortable.

Needing it is normal. It’s not a sign that something is wrong.

What if it feels too strong?

Turn it down immediately.

Start on the lowest setting and increase slowly. The slowest setting is the first one that comes on as you press the ON button.

Your body may prefer softer, slower stimulation right now.

You’re always in control.

How often should I use it?

There’s no rule. Some women prefer short, regular sessions. Others use it occasionally.

Listen to your body. Consistency can help rebuild familiarity, but there’s no right schedule.

Is it normal to feel emotional about this?

Yes.

Changes in desire can feel confusing. Trying something new can bring up unexpected feelings.

That doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means this matters to you.

Go gently.

How to Start

Inara is not about performance.

Choose a moment that's actually yours

Charge and clean before you start

Lube isn't optional. It's part of the experience.

What it actually feels like

If nothing happens, that's information, not failure

Aftercare is the whole thing

Still have questions?

A few things you might be thinking

How to Start

Inara is not about performance.

Choose a moment that's actually yours

Charge and clean before you start

Lube isn't optional. It's part of the experience.

What it actually feels like

If nothing happens, that's information, not failure

Aftercare is the whole thing

Still have questions?

A few things you might be thinking

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